Arranging your own funeral

Thinking about what arrangements you would like for your own funeral now can help your friends and family when the time comes. 

You can write down your wishes for your funeral at any time. If you have a will, you could keep these documents together. You could also give the instructions to the person who will be planning your funeral.

Visit the GOV.UK website for information and guidance on making a will 

Making your own funeral arrangements

The things listed on this page will help your loved ones to carry out your exact wishes for your own funeral. You can use these as a guide to write a document stating your own wishes. When completed and signed, we recommend that you keep it with your Will, if you have made one. Otherwise it should be kept somewhere known to the person who will be arranging your funeral.

A funeral service is an occasion for family and friends to come together and support each other. It is a time to remember and reflect on the person who has died. It is also an important part of the grieving process.

You can contribute to this process by providing clear instructions about your funeral. This may prevent potential family friction. Funeral wishes, either in a Will or other document, are not legally binding. It is sensible to identify someone who will act for you and give instructions after your death. This will give you the  reassurance that your requirements will be respected. It is also helpful, and often comforting, if your family and friends can follow your wishes too.

When making arrangements, remember that this is a final opportunity for your family and friends to say goodbye. The more personal you can make it, the more meaningful the funeral will be. 

Your personal choices 

When thinking about what you would like to happen after you die, some personal things to consider are: 

• if you would prefer to die at home if possible or if you would like your body taken to your home before the funeral 
• funeral plan details, if you have a pre-paid funeral plan 
• your preferred funeral director 
• what type of coffin you would like 
• if you would like your family and friends to visit you in the Chapel of Rest at the funeral director’s before the funeral 
• what type of vehicle you would like your coffin to be transported in 
• whether you would like your family to follow your hearse in limousines or their own vehicles 
• whether you would like family to carry your coffin - include their names (at least 4)  
• if you would like flowers, a restriction on flowers, or donations to a charity instead 
• if you would like your death to be announced in a newspaper and which one 

Your funeral service

Think about the type of funeral service you would like, for example: 

• whether you want to be cremated or buried 
• the name and address of your preferred crematorium or cemetery 
• if you already have a grave space reserved, include the grave number and the Grant of ownership  
• whether you want a funeral service or not 
• if you want a religious service, which denomination 
• where you would like the service to be held. for example, a crematorium, a church or meeting place 
• the name of any particular minister or officiant you want to conduct funeral  
• if you would like a committal ceremony at the graveside,  cemetery or crematorium chapel 
• whether you would like your service to be open to all friends and family or a private funeral with only your family attending 
• any specific people you would like or not like to be invited 
• what music you would like to be played on entry, on exit and during the service 
• whether you would like an organist, other musicians or pre-recorded music 
• any poems or readings you would like 

After a cremation

If you choose to have a cremation, consider what you would like to happen after the funeral service: 

• where you would like your cremated remains to be buried or strewn. This could be a family grave, a crematorium, remembrance gardens, a churchyard or at sea. 
• if you would like your cremated remains to be buried or strewn in the same place as someone else. Include details of who and where.
• if you would like a memorial service to be held before your remains are buried or strewn 
• if you would like a memorial provided in the crematorium. You can find out about memorial options from our cemeteries office. 

After a burial

If you choose to have a burial, consider what you would like to happen after the funeral service: 

• if you would like a memorial on your grave
• your choice of memorial mason - view a list of approved memorial masons
• the wording you would like on your memorial